Why do exes contact you out of the blue? 13 reasons! - Relationship notes. (2023)

A text message from an exnot a big deal to some, but shocking to some. While you're here, you might be interested in why your exes are contacting you out of the blue.

It may seem strange to some people when an ex contacts you out of the blue. This article will help you understand the situations and reasons behind the sudden effort to communicate. It will also tell you how you should handle such situations, and more importantly, how you should react to them.

This article is mainly about exes contacting you after years. After reading it, you will understand his current situation and why they tried to contact him. This article is not about getting it back; Instead, it's about understanding why exes contact you out of the blue.

What am I going to learn?

  • Why do exes contact you out of the blue?
    • 1. You feel lonely
    • 2. They contacted you to make you jealous.
    • 3. You are sentimental
    • 4. They really miss you
    • 5. You were evicted
    • 6. You can't continue
    • 7. You recognized your value
    • 8. They want to be friends
    • 9. They are unhappy without you
    • 10. They want to know how you are doing
    • 11. Maybe they are to blame
    • 12. You are drunk
    • 13. They want to fix things
  • Do the exes of The Blue contact you because they want you back?
    • How do you know if they want me back?
  • How are you supposed to react when exes contact you out of the blue?
    • Try to find out the reason for the sudden approach
    • Do you really want to answer?
    • Don't be clingy if you want her back
    • Be nice when your ex contacts you
  • Diploma

Why do exes contact you out of the blue?

Most exes contact you out of curiosity or to see how you are doing. You might get texts or calls from your ex to get his attention, or maybeyour ex wants you back.

It doesn't feel good when an ex contacts you out of the blue, especially if you're not over it yet. you must not rushReply to SMS or callsif the two of you still haven't gotten over your past problems.

Rushing will make you feel even more depressed, depressed and anxious, and this could lead to a new breakup. There must be a reason why exes contact you out of the blue. It would be better if you properly analyze the reasons and situations before taking any steps.

There can be many reasons why an ex contacts you years later or out of the blue. Below are several reasons why exes may contact you.

1. You feel lonely

Another reason why your ex is suddenly contacting you after such a long time could be because it's him.fighting alone with your feelings. Since they have no one to turn to, they contact you. Because you two spent so much time together, her ex wanted me to comfort her.

Being alone and not knowing who else to talk to, they tried to pass the time by contacting you. Ex-boyfriends contact you because they think talking to you wouldn't hurt them. Talking to you would be a better option to kill time.

2. They contacted you to make you jealous.

Your ex may be trying to make you jealous so that you can see that you still love him and want to be with him. Or maybe your ex is trying to figure out if there's a chance you could get back together. on the other hand maybethey miss you,I regret breaking up with you, and we hope to see you again.

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You need to think and analyze the situation before doing anything.

Most of the time, we do things to make people think we are happy when we really are not. If you notice your ex trying to brag on social media and trying to get in touch with you, something must be wrong. Your ex must want you to get back together. His social networks show that they are happy and better off without you, but the reality is quite the opposite.

Too much jealousy in a relationship can be harmful, so you have to keep the balance even if you love her. If your ex wants you back, he needs to work on being the best version of himself.

Jealousy can lead to insecurities and trust issues in a relationship. You can't see her with anyone else; It shouldn't be the only reason to make amends.

3. You are sentimental

SomePeople are overly sentimental or emotional.. They keep their emotions in check. Maybe your ex reached out to you after years because he got excited about something and missed you.

When exes contact you out of the blue, it doesn't mean they've changed; Rather, it's because sometimes they miss you. Maybe your ex went somewhere the two of you used to hang out. Or maybe they remember a pleasant memory that prompted them to contact you to see if you're okay.

4. They really miss you

Your ex must have missed you during that time.contactless timebecause they were in the habit of talking to you. Now that your ex is in a no contact phase, he must be missing those chats and long calls with you.

They must miss your presence in their lives, even if it's just a small talk like good morning or something. Therefore, contacting you should be a good reason to make you aware of his absence in your life if you have not moved yet.

it will only happenif they have not progressedor you have no one else in your life. The separation must have made him see your importance in his life. Your ex may start to miss you because of your absence.

5. You were evicted

When you get a text or call from your ex, you wonder why they contact you after so long. Your ex may have texted you because he is going through another breakup with her new partner. You have to go through a lot of emotions at this stage.

People tend to contact their ex after dating someone else if the new relationship isn't going well either. Maybe they broke up with your ex and the new partner wasn't as supportive and attractive as you were.

6. You can't continue

If you're breaking up and want to move on, but your ex contacts you out of the blue, you need to know what to do. The first is that you need to find out why. Maybe your ex hasn't been able to move on and she still loves you.

both are inhealing process after a breakup, but you're fine when you started the break up. However, your ex may not be doing so well. Your ex may still miss you and want to get back together.

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Generally,Boys usually understand these trivial things a little late.. However, when they do, they persist and find it almost impossible to get over it.

7. You recognized your value

Your ex cheated on you, broke up with you, and moved on with your new relationship. So after a while you get a text and you're curious why the ex texted me out of the blue.

You two had fun when you were together. Your love for them was intense and you gave them all your love and care. Her ex cared too, but somehow she fell in love with someone else. You were seriously hurt when your ex broke up and left you alone.

I know a guy who didn't appreciate the love and care his ex gave him when they were in a relationship. Later, when this girl moved on with someone else, he contacted her. Has this person stood up to her ex and confessed that I miss you and that I was wrong and that you can get back together?

People tend to know the value of their partners after they leave. It is the worst reality in this world, but nobody can do anything about it.

8. They want to be friends

Wondering why your ex contacted you out of the blue is not uncommon, but it is very common. You may feel like going back. But not always;Maybe your ex wants to be your friend..

It could be because they miss you as a friend they used to share their feelings with or even as a daily routine. I think it's quite possible that he still wants to be your friend. They may want to keep in touch with you as a friend.

When you love someone, you naturally don't become friends with that person. However, you might think that becoming friends with your ex is less embarrassing. It's not as rare to find a friend as it is to find an ex.

Your ex may want to get back in touch to see if you have a chance to get back together. In this case, it is possible that your ex will first become your friend, and then return to a relationship with you.

9. They are unhappy without you

If your ex broke up with you, they will most likely regret it one day. When you get a text from your exthey are sad and unhappy without you; know that the day has come.

Usually, people change a lot when they are in love. Some people do better as individuals, while others act like spoiled brats because of the love they receive from their partners.

Your ex may be a person who has become a better person because of your love and care. However, after breaking up, they reluctantly or willingly went back to their bad habits. They may miss you because your care and love made them better people.

They may not be as relaxed as when you were with them. Your ex may regret hurting you and break up with you.

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10. They want to know how you are doing

Your ex must be curious about you; That's why they contacted you. That way they'll know what you've been up to lately. How have you been lately and what is your marital status?

It's probably a way to check if you've made progress. If your ex wants you back, he will keep trying to contact you and work things out. Your ex can also contact you temporarily. They can stop doing this if they find someone else to date.

11. Maybe they are to blame

Your ex texted you out of the blue; You might want to know why her ex is texting you after so long. The reason could be that your ex feels guilty. Your ex is to blame because the relationship ended due to a lack of communication and understanding.

It could also be because he wants to be with you again. Or your ex is simply trying to clarify his position so that he feels less guilty about what he did to you.

Maybe they feel guilty for hurting you for no reason, then maybe they want you to move on and maybe they tell you that you deserve better.

However, if you want to get back together, you have to ask yourself if you want that or not.

12. You are drunk

The most likely chance that someone will come into contact with your ex is when they are under the influence of alcohol. But it's not an acceptable reason for anyone to think that their ex still loves them.

What if they contact you when they are drunk but not when they are sober? You may be the first person that comes to mind when you are drunk. However, that does not mean that they are still in love with you.

13. They want to fix things

Your ex might want you back in his life if he contacts you frequently. However, I must say that she must make sure to think carefully before making a decision.

You have to prove yourself and become a better version of yourself. Then you can decide whether or not you want your ex back in your life.

Do the exes of The Blue contact you because they want you back?

Whether your ex loves you or not depends on their situation. If your ex still loves you and hasn't moved on yet, it could mean that she really wants you back. The purpose behind his contact is obvious.

However, there are times when exes suddenly contact you out of boredom or curiosity. Your ex may not be honest or have feelings for you in these situations.

Whatever the scenarios, be very careful and active. It is better that you stay alert and observe all the actions of your ex before making a decision.

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How do you know if they want me back?

Confused about how to know if they want you back or not? There is a sure way to get your ex to act when he really wants you back in his life. So when you go through these situations, you may be right in thinking that your ex wants you back.

They may also try to clear up past issues by telling you directly or indirectly. If your ex wants you back, he will remain single until you get back together.

How are you supposed to react when exes contact you out of the blue?

The most important thing is that you first understand what you really want to do. do you want to get back together? Yes or no? You have to be clear about what you want and what you don't want.

Why do exes contact you out of the blue? 13 reasons! - Relationship notes. (1)

Try to find out the reason for the sudden approach

You got a text from your ex out of the blue. Do you understand and are you trying to figure out why they tried to contact you? First try to find out the causes, and then decide anything.

We suggest some possible reasons why your ex texted you out of the blue. It would be better if you read them carefully. Please read these points carefully; We are sure this will help you figure out why your ex is contacting you out of the blue.

Do you really want to answer?

It is the most critical part of the entire non-contact or separation process. Do you want a patch? It completely depends on your decision. You are responsible for your choice and decision; no one can force you.

if you want her backYou need to talk about the things that caused the break up., whether due to insecurities or trust issues or other issues. By discussing these points before getting into a relationship, both of you will avoid unnecessary problems.

If they broke up due to certain circumstances, I think it makes sense to maybe put things together.

Don't be clingy if you want her back

We understand that you have decided to get back together with your ex, buttry not to be clingy. If you really want a reconciliation, you have to act wisely and not be too obvious.

It's good to put your pride aside while you're chasing someone. Being very courteous but consistent when looking up your ex will help. However, being stubborn and clingy are two different things.

If you are understanding and polite, you will get your ex back much faster. However. If you become clingy and lazy, your ex will not come back to you.

Be nice when your ex contacts you

It's not a good idea to brag too much or pretend you don't want to. It will only hurt you at the end of the day. It is better to be nice and polite with your ex. Show your love and sincerity towards your ex.

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Anyone can experience a break in their life. Not everyone has to go through this, but a lot of people do. A text or phone call from a long-missing ex can terrify you, and you wonder why exes are contacting you out of the blue.

However, if this happens to you, stay calm and try not to get too excited. Please don't let this affect you so deeply that you can't get over it. Could your ex be contacting you to ask how you've been lately?

When exes contact you out of the blue, there are a few reasons. Maybe your ex is lonely or bored; they can be guilty and unhappy with you. On the other hand, your ex may want to win you back because he misses you or still has feelings for you. However, it would be best if he understands his motives for approaching you before taking any action.


What does it mean if your ex suddenly contacts you? ›

If your ex contacts you after a breakup, they might want to try and get back together with you but don't want to say that directly. They are sending a few messages to feel out the situation and to see if you will respond and warm up again.

What does it mean when an ex contacts you out of the blue? ›

He just broke up with someone.

If a man you dated a while ago texts you out of the blue, he might have just broken up with his until-now current flame. Feeling wounded, he wants to reconnect with you, no matter how briefly, to simply feel loved again. He remembers you fondly, so he texts you to see what's up.

What are the signs that your ex still has feelings for you? ›

Signs Your Ex Still Has Feelings For You
  • They keep texting or calling you. ...
  • They follow you on social media. ...
  • They don't return your stuff. ...
  • They contact your friends, or their friends contact you. ...
  • They cross your path. ...
  • They get jealous or want to make you feel jealous. ...
  • They are not moving on.
Dec 9, 2022

How do you respond to an ex who reaches out? ›

Try these things on for size.
  1. Think about how it will affect you. ...
  2. If you're currently dating someone, you should consider their feelings. ...
  3. Take your time responding. ...
  4. Keep your response light. ...
  5. Don't rush into a response, friendship, or rebound. ...
  6. Be open and honest with them.
Nov 29, 2018

What goes through your ex mind during no contact? ›

The person who did the dumping usually feels strength (and often relief) at the very first, but with the days and weeks of no contact your ex likely begins to develop feelings of doubt in their decision, missing you, fear that you have moved on, and confusion that you have not chased, begged, and pleaded as most others ...

How do you respond when your ex texts you? ›

How To Respond To a Text From Your Ex – 3 Situations That Cover Everything
  1. Hey, how are you. ...
  2. I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but I miss you. ...
  3. I miss you too. ...
  4. Hey, it's been a while. ...
  5. Hey, I appreciate you checking in on me. ...
  6. Hey, I miss all the late-night cuddles. ...
  7. Hey, I appreciate you reaching out.
Oct 29, 2020

How do you respond to your ex out of the blue? ›

How to respond to an ex you would like to keep a relationship with
  1. Be friendly. ...
  2. Don't go back to how things were. ...
  3. Be cautious. ...
  4. Be honest. ...
  5. Ask for their intentions. ...
  6. Don't let it get nasty. ...
  7. For friendship, keep the conversation neutral. ...
  8. Don't talk about your dating life.

How do you test if your ex wants you back? ›

20 Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
  1. They Make Attempts To Stay In Touch. ...
  2. They Keep You Updated. ...
  3. They Get And Want To Make You Jealous. ...
  4. They Pretend That They Need Your Help. ...
  5. They Keep Bringing Up Your Memories Together. ...
  6. They Tell You How Far They Have Come. ...
  7. They Keep Checking With Mutual Friends About Your Well-being.
Dec 20, 2022

How do you know if your ex misses you too? ›

8 signs your ex misses you, because it might not be all in your...
  1. They are steadily active on your Instagram. ...
  2. They haven't been spotted with anyone new. ...
  3. OR, they are constantly with other partners, and they make sure you know it. ...
  4. Late night calls and texts. ...
  5. They are judgmental about your new partner.
Oct 27, 2016

Do feelings for an ex ever go away? ›

“In many instances, people feel those love-like feelings for quite some time after a breakup. This can vary widely depending on the person, their circumstances and personal history. Some people may just need days or weeks whereas others may take months or years to move on from an ex.”

What causes an ex to reach out? ›

Exes reach out for a lot of reasons, and wanting a relationship again might be one of them. However, your ex might also be reaching out because they want closure, because they want to be friends, or because they just want to hook up one last time. It can be a shock to get a random text or phone call from your ex.

Should you ignore your ex when they reach out? ›

This could provide you with closure, but if you're still upset over the breakup, it's perfectly acceptable to ignore it. For break-ups that have caused a lot of emotional distress, avoiding contact with your ex may be best to give youtime to move on.

How do you know if your ex wants you back but won t admit it? ›

Another subtle sign that your ex might want you back is if she pays a lot of attention to your social media. What is this? For example, if she wants you back but won't admit it, she will start keeping tabs on you and checking out things that you do. This can include monitoring all of your social media accounts.

What will make your ex miss you? ›

How To Make Your Ex Miss You After A Breakup
  • Do Not Try To Contact Them. ...
  • Do Not Receive Their Calls And Respond To Their Texts. ...
  • Reinvent Yourself. ...
  • Meet New People And Make New Friends. ...
  • Talk To Their Friends. ...
  • Check Out The Outside Dating World. ...
  • Take A Vacation. ...
  • Be Active On Social Media.
Dec 13, 2022

How do you know if my ex misses me during no contact? ›

15 signs he is missing you during no-contact
  1. Everyone around him knows he is depressed. This may not mean a lot to you, except when you are looking at a guy who used to be outspoken and boisterous. ...
  2. He now spends much time online. ...
  3. He refrains from dating for a long time. ...
  4. He tries “too hard” to flirt with other girls.
Apr 29, 2022

What happens when you don't reply to your ex? ›

So, when you actively choose not to respond to your ex, you're taking away their behavioral freedom of being able to talk to you. Their mind makes them think about talking to you even more, and they will thus try to get you to talk to them again; however, they can.

Why an ex contacts you years later? ›

Why Do Exes Reach Out Years Later? There are several reasons why ex's reach out years later, including they are just checking up on you, they want to offer a sincere apology, or they are jealous of your happiness.

Why does my ex keep contacting me when he dumped me? ›

“Most of the time this would be for romantic or sexual reasons, but sometimes they might just want to be friends again.” If the relationship ended on bad terms or your ex feels the breakup was their fault, they may be texting you out of guilt and a desire to make things right, Rodman added.

Why do exes reach out after months? ›

Maybe they're feeling a bit lonely, bored, or sorry for themself. Or maybe they're simply looking for attention. In that moment in which they get back in touch, they're not thinking about how it will impact you. They're just thinking about trying to meet their own selfish needs and are focused on how they're feeling.

How do you know if your breakup is temporary? ›

Here are some signs your breakup is temporary:
  1. You haven't moved on. ...
  2. You still hang out together. ...
  3. They've been sending you mixed messages. ...
  4. You're learning how to communicate with your ex. ...
  5. They reminisce with you. ...
  6. They reach out during trials. ...
  7. They ask about you through friends. ...
  8. You have both been working on your issues.
Jul 28, 2022

Can your ex forget you easily? ›

I'm here to tell you: It is HIGHLY unlikely that your ex will forget about you. Unless they experience a head injury that causes them to lose their memory, they are not going to forget you.

How often do exes fall back in love? ›

Key points. Research finds that 40-50 percent of people have reunited with an ex to start a new relationship. On-again relationships tend to suffer lower relationship quality and worse functioning than never-broken relationships. People often resume relationships with ex-partners because of lingering feelings.

Why do I still think about my ex everyday? ›

Sometimes, people are still thinking about their Ex for months, or even years after the relationship ended because of lingering insecurities or comparisons they're making — even subconsciously. This is often true when your Ex has moved on before you have.

Why do I still love my ex even though he hurt me? ›

We feel they love us even though they treat us badly. This contradiction is known as cognitive dissonance, where we believe two contradictory thoughts at the same time. As a result of the contradiction we can become more extreme in our thoughts and behaviours as we wrestle with the disconnect.

How long does it usually take for an ex to reach out? ›

Without any prompting, expect to hear from your ex any time between 8 and 75 days. There is almost always the intent and desire to reach out to your ex.

Is ignoring your ex the best revenge? ›

Silence speaks volumes

The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.

What does it mean when your ex contacts you during no contact? ›

This is very normal and it should actually be expected. If your ex reaches out during your no contact period, it means that they've taken notice of your absence. Now it's important to note that every situation is unique.

How do you know if your ex secretly wants you back? ›

The signs that your ex wants you back can be subtle, like enquiring about your well-being from mutual friends, trying to keep in touch without overstepping boundaries, asking for help from you, and being all over your social media. First, however, keep in mind how the relationship ended.

How long is no contact rule for ex? ›

The no-contact rule refers to cutting off all contact with an ex following a breakup, and it's the best method for moving on from an ex. No contact should last for a minimum of 60 days, and it includes no texting, no calling, and no interacting on social media.

Can your ex miss you but not contact you? ›

Yes, an ex misses you during No Contact. They miss you because they no longer have what they used to have. Your ex misses you even though you don't talk because they have time to adjust to your absence. This will help them reflect and miss you more.

Should I reply to my ex after no contact? ›

A confession response is ideal when your ex apologized during no contact, or you've realized that maybe you have feelings for them. This type of response might be a little too vulnerable, but confessing your true feelings and emotions can also be very freeing.

How do you know if your ex wants you back but is scared? ›

One of the most obvious signs your ex wants you back but is scared is that she still talks to you. In some instances, if she were done with you, she wouldn't want anything else to do with you. On the other hand, if she is communicating with you, she doesn't want you out of her life.


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