Ex-boyfriends often contact each other after 5, 10, or even 20 years. They're curious about the ex they lost contact with, so they try to reconnect and learn more about their ex's new life. sometimes they are easyhe wants to know how his ex is doingbecause they have been thinking about their ex a lot and sometimes they want to know if their ex is ready to get back together and reconnect emotionally.
Finding out what they want is not too difficult because most of the time they will tell you willingly. They'll say, "I want to be friends because I miss you, or because I'm bored, or because I want to see if you want to give us another chance."
You should be careful with words like "I miss you" and "I love you" because these words rarely mean what you think they mean.
Most of the time they indicate that something emotional is going on with your ex and you need to figure out what it is so you don't get caught up in a bad situation again and get used to emotional support.
If your ex left you and it's been around 5 years since you heard from them, the first thing you should do is find out why your ex is contacting you. This not only protects you from getting used to it and hurting him, but it also helps you understand what is going on in your ex's life and what he expects of you.
Of course, if he or she is expecting a friendship and you are not ready or interested in it, you should not accept it.befriend your exIf you don't have much or no respect for your ex, that wouldn't be the most adult thing to do because you would be going against your principles.
You would give in to the idea of being polite and letting your ex do what he wants. Care should always be taken with aEx returns to your life years laterbecause there is a reason why he or she is reaching out. And that reason could have something to do with life not going as he imagined.
Something can cause your ex a lot of fear and pain. And you need to get to the bottom of it so you don't get back into a relationship and get taken advantage of. This time you want to be smarter. Especially if your ex left you and treated you horribly afterwards.
In this case, you should try to find out if something bad happened to your ex that inspired you to apologize and ask for forgiveness.
Today we are going to talk about the steps you should take if your ex contacts you after 5 years or more.

There are many reasonsWhy do exes contact you out of the blue?after 5 years. We will try to cover as much as possible so that you can identify the reasons why your ex is contacting you.
That being said, the most likely explanation for your ex contacting you is that they were curious about you. He has spent a lot of time thinking about you and has shown interest in contacting you. And when enough interest finally arose, your ex decided to contact you and find out what you've been up to all these years. Your ex wanted to know if you are happy and if you found that special person with whom to share your happiness.
Curiosity often leads people, years later, to contact their ex-boyfriends. It starts with some old thoughts, but these thoughts gradually turn into a desire to understand what is happening with the person with whom you used to be very close.
Understanding their ex's life eases their burning need for information about their ex and allows them to focus on themselves and move on. This explains why so many people (especially dumpers) disappear after reporting. They receive information (empowerment) from their ex, then quickly get bored and no longer feel the need to keep communicating.
Another possible reason why your ex contacted you after 5 years is that something went wrong in your ex's life. Something or someone hurt your ex, lowered your self-esteem and pride, and forced your ex to turn to you for protection and comfort.
Since you were close with your ex not so long ago, your ex still considered you trustworthy. He or she thought and hoped that you would provide protection and support until he or she recovered and felt better.
It is clear that your ex did not think about what he would do to you once he was healed. When your ex reached out, he was just focused on the present moment and he just wanted your understanding, validation, encouragement, and compassion.
He or she needed these things so life (especially health and wellness) could go back to the way it was before they got hurt and sought support.
If your ex needs your help with something, they won't necessarily tell you directly. He or she may be seeking her approval and support indirectly by sending her mixed and hopeful messages, also known asBreadcrumbs.
An example of breadcrumbs could be messages like:
- I miss you
- I think of you
- Our relationship was special.
- I really care for you
- you are very important to me
- You are the best
These words are often a mix of projection and delusion, something a person says when they are in pain and want to calm down. You need to keep them out of your heart so you don't walk away just because your ex is having problems.
Also, sometimes people contact their ex simply because they are bored. They have no one to talk to and don't know what to do with themselves, so they look for an ex that they respect at least to some degree because that person can keep them busy until they find something better. quarrel
Essentially, your ex is your temporary source of entertainment and a distraction that allows you to stay engaged.
So when your ex is bored, just know that he will only talk to you when it is convenient for him.
Would your ex talk to you if he or she:
- alone or without people to talk to
- Wait online
- Waiting for friends/partners
- in a bus
- during a break from work/school
- sick at home
When exes have enough time to think things through, they come to you and kill the boredom. They sign up because they're tired of hanging around and want to do something fun. When your ex does this, it's obvious that you're not his top priority anymore because it's been 5 years since you heard from him.
You weren't important to your ex, so you probably aren't very important now either.
Another possible explanation for why your ex is suddenly texting or calling you is that they are finally feeling guilty about what they did to you. It is possible that yourEx got hit by karmaand/or that he finally regrets having treated you badly/incorrectly.
You see, the guilt doesn't always kick in right after the breakup, when emotions are running high. Sometimes it happens much later when the shooter gets involved with someone who is impulsive and vindictive and reminds the shooter of his past behavior.
The shooter then tries to assuage his guilt by turning to the shooter. Sometimes this happens after a few weeks, and sometimes years later. It is impossible to predict when a person will encounter an obstacle in life and think about it.
But in general, the more underdeveloped a person is, or vice versa, the more trusting he is, the more likely a person will upset the wrong person, begin to feel sorry for himself, and go to the fool to apologize directly or indirectly. / to gain recognition.
We should also mention that some exes are just looking for sex. They are running out of sexual partners, so they are looking for people from the past to spice up their sex life. These people usually start flirting with their ex soon after contacting him and ask to meet at night when it is more convenient for them.
While exes know each other and can quickly reconnect if they choose, always remember that 5 years is a long time and there is a time and place to flirt and sleep together. This time it is not immediately after contact. Eventually, the exes find out where they are and what they want.
With that being said, here are some reasons why your ex contacted you after 5 years.

Should I get back together with my ex after 5 years?
People change and grow over time, so keep in mind that your ex may have grown up a bit. How much you have really grown depends on the experiences, lessons, and self-reflections you have gone through.
The more work your ex has done on himself, the better the chances that something good will come out of the relationship if you give him another chance.
To understand how much your ex has improved, you should try to learn more about his way of thinking. Ask your ex lots of post-breakup discovery questions and see if she has grown or not.
Once you feel that your ex has grown beyond what he was before, you need to find out if he respects you and is back with you. Sometimes fools turn their backs on romantic rejection and pain so they don't necessarily get back together with their exes. They use their exes again to ease her anxiety and mend her broken hearts.
This is something to be aware of and avoid at all costs. Before you get back together with your ex, consider if they are in pain and need to reconnect with you to end that pain. You can do this simply by talking to your ex about the awkward things that happened before he contacted you.
Your ex may not tell you everything at first, but try to encourage him to open up anyway. Make him feel safe by sharing difficult things with you, and then decide if getting back together with your ex is the right thing to do.
I can't decide if it's for you because I don't know your ex. All I can do is talk you out of it if your ex has recently left and you are heartbroken or if your relationship with your ex has been unhealthy and unfulfilling.
Whatever you do, don't get back into a relationship with your ex as soon as you get the chance. You need to take it slow so that you can get to know your ex again and see what or who made your ex come to you.
There is a reason for every action and inaction. Find that reason before venturing into the unknown with your ex.
Here are my tips on what to do when your ex contacts you after 5 years.

Whether it's been 5 years or 20 years since you last heard from your ex, remember that just getting back together with your ex won't make you have a fairy tale relationship. In order to have a successful relationship, both of you need to work on yourself individually and as a couple.
That way, you can work out your differences and make sure the relationship doesn't go down the same path as before.
So again, be smart. You don't have to get back with an ex just because it's you.ex wants you back. You can simply take the time to get to know your ex and make a logical decision that makes the most sense for you. Of course, when you're in a relationship with someone, you don't leave your partner to be with your ex.
You may have feelings for your ex, but those feelings don't necessarily come from a healthy place. They are likely coming from a place of rejection (battered ego and low self-esteem).
Did your ex contact you after 5 years and you wonder why he or she contacted you? Post your thoughts and questions in the comments below.
Or if you want to talk to us about your ex's breadcrumb, get in touchHere.
Related Posts:
- My ex contacted me after 10 years.
- I can't get over my ex after 5 years.
- Why do I still think about my ex after 10 years?
- Should I talk to my ex after 2 years?
FAQs
Why is my ex messaging me after 5 years? ›
They Are Just Curious. Being curious about you, your dating life, or your life, in general, could also be a reason why your ex is texting you. This could happen a few months or years after you have broken up. It's good to be in a place where you both are curious about each other without having any attachment.
Why would an ex contact you years later? ›Why Do Exes Reach Out Years Later? There are several reasons why ex's reach out years later, including they are just checking up on you, they want to offer a sincere apology, or they are jealous of your happiness.
What to do when ex reaches out after years? ›- Think about how it will affect you. ...
- If you're currently dating someone, you should consider their feelings. ...
- Take your time responding. ...
- Keep your response light. ...
- Don't rush into a response, friendship, or rebound. ...
- Be open and honest with them.
Sometimes, people are still thinking about their Ex for months, or even years after the relationship ended because of lingering insecurities or comparisons they're making — even subconsciously. This is often true when your Ex has moved on before you have.
Why would an ex want to meet up after years? ›He misses you
If your ex wants to meet up to “catch up” it's likely that he has felt an emptiness in his life since you exited it, and simply wants to meet up to see you, talk with you, be with you. You are in a prime position if this is the case. Missing you is the first step to getting him back.
The no-contact rule refers to cutting off all contact with an ex following a breakup, and it's the best method for moving on from an ex. No contact should last for a minimum of 60 days, and it includes no texting, no calling, and no interacting on social media.
Is it common for exes to get back together years later? ›Research finds that 40-50 percent of people have reunited with an ex to start a new relationship. On-again relationships tend to suffer lower relationship quality and worse functioning than never-broken relationships. People often resume relationships with ex-partners because of lingering feelings.
How do you respond to an ex who reaches out? ›Be casual and polite to keep things friendly.
Try not to immediately dive into questions or beg them to get back together with you. Instead, reply to their message like you would anyone else. This can help foster a casual relationship with your ex, which is great if you want to be friends with them.
Therefore, a reunion after years is not uncommon. Life goes on for such people. They love again, develop romantic feelings again, become intimate with other partners again and again, but something keeps the desire to get their ex back strong.
What does it mean when your ex texts you after a long time? ›Probably he wants to feel light and find his mental peace by connecting with you and maybe even arguing with you. When keeping quiet on things becomes tough, this is their preferred way of sailing through the rough phase. Loneliness can be another major reason behind his urge to text you.
Is my ex breadcrumbing me? ›
The Most Common Breadcrumbing Signs We See In Real Life
Asking For A Favor Or Doing You A Favor. They Set A Date To See You And Then Stand You Up Last Minute. Repeating Your Wants Directly To You But Never Following Through On It. A Lot Of Talking To You While They Have Another Person They Are Dating.
So, when you actively choose not to respond to your ex, you're taking away their behavioral freedom of being able to talk to you. Their mind makes them think about talking to you even more, and they will thus try to get you to talk to them again; however, they can.
Do feelings for an ex ever go away? ›“In many instances, people feel those love-like feelings for quite some time after a breakup. This can vary widely depending on the person, their circumstances and personal history. Some people may just need days or weeks whereas others may take months or years to move on from an ex.”
How do you know if your ex is thinking about you? ›If your ex is trying to contact you, or maybe even trying to speak to you at weird hours, then it might be a sign they still think about you. Another big sign is social media. If they somehow didn't get rid of you via an unfriending or straight block, it might mean they miss you.
Will my toxic ex miss me? ›Your ex probably won't miss you if your relationship was short (1-3 months), a rebound, or strewn with toxicity (i.e., cheating, lying, abuse). That said, walking away and letting them go still gives you the best chance of making them miss you. But here's the catch: your ex missing you doesn't really matter.
How do you know if your ex is serious about wanting you back? ›- They Make Attempts To Stay In Touch. ...
- They Keep You Updated. ...
- They Get And Want To Make You Jealous. ...
- They Pretend That They Need Your Help. ...
- They Keep Bringing Up Your Memories Together. ...
- They Tell You How Far They Have Come. ...
- They Keep Checking With Mutual Friends About Your Well-being.
Don't try to recap every detail that happened since your break-up. Focus on small talk or other easy-going conversation topics. Focus on asking how their day has been, or how they are doing generally. If your ex asks the same, then focus on topics that are light and friendly.
Why would an ex want to stay friends? ›There are four main reasons, Rebecca Griffith and her colleagues found, why exes feel compelled to maintain a friendship or to suggest doing so: for civility (i.e., I want this breakup to hurt less than it will otherwise), for reasons relating to unresolved romantic desires (I want to see other people but keep you ...
Is ignoring your ex the best revenge? ›Silence speaks volumes
The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.
The male mind during no contact
The no-contact rule male psychology forces him to recognize his loneliness. After a breakup, if you stop contacting him, he will feel free and enjoy this phase as much as he can. But, with time, the loneliness and guilt pang will start to kick in.
What does no contact do to a woman? ›
Going 'no-contact' with someone you spent a lot of time with and planned a future with can be painful. A woman experiencing the stages of no contact is likely to feel angry, sad, and lonely. While a woman is likely to feel sadness in the early stages of no contact, she will quickly get over her ex as time goes on.
Can time apart fix a relationship? ›Taking time apart can allow you both to think about the issues in your relationship, cool off, learn new coping strategies, and come back together with a different lens or perspective that can be difficult to have when you're together and actively fighting through your issues.
How often does it work when exes get back together? ›A study of 3,512 people found that only 15% got back together with their ex. Another 14% briefly reunited only to break up, and a whopping 70% called it quits for good after their break-up.
Can you get back with your ex after 5 years? ›In most cases it is possible to get back with an ex when you have a positive attitude and outlook. Even if you dated someone in high school or years ago it is still possible for you to start a new love story with that person if you set your mind to it.
How do you respond to Breadcrumbing ex? ›- Call them out. When you think someone's breadcrumbing you, pointing out the behavior can accomplish two goals: ...
- Initiate a conversation about relationship goals. People want different things from their relationships. ...
- Suggest a specific date and time to meet. ...
- Respect your own needs.
Be aware of whether your ex can really give you what you need. If your goal is to get answers to questions you still have about the breakup, reach out only if you believe your ex has your best intentions at heart or if you believe your ex will be willing to give you honest answers.
What makes a man choose one woman over another? ›Sexual Compatibility
Sexual compatibility is one of the top reasons a man chooses a woman over another. Many men prefer a woman that matches their sexual styles. These styles may include her moves, the way she kisses, the way she dresses, and so on.
Many guys admit that they want their ex back because new relationships are different than what they're used to. They crave the comfort of familiarity. Being with someone offers security. Some men miss having someone in their life who they can always count on when they need support.
Do emotionally immature exes come back? ›To put it briefly, people who are only temporarily emotionally unavailable do come back. Remember that alone time and space can do wonders as they can reflect on their own feelings. Encouraging them to get help can also help them understand themselves and their behavior.
Why do exes randomly contact you? ›They have no romantic feelings. They consider you as a good and reliable person to spend time with. An unexpected text from your ex might mean they are tentatively holding their hand out for friendship. They are ready to move on and let you go ahead with your life.
What is Breadcrumbing narcissism? ›
Breadcrumbing is the act of sending out flirtatious, but non-committal social signals (i.e. "breadcrumbs") in order to lure a romantic partner in without expending much effort. In other words, it's leading someone on.
How do you outsmart Breadcrumbers? ›- Suggest making concrete plans. If the breadcrumber hits you up out of the blue for a little flirt sesh, suggest making concrete plans to meet up. ...
- Be real with yourself. ...
- Let go of the need for closure. ...
- Be upfront. ...
- Just dip.
But have you heard about breadcrumbing? “In a relationship context, breadcrumbing refers to a person who gives you just enough 'crumbs' of attention or affection to give you hope and keep you on the hook — but not enough to make you feel comfortable or assured the relationship is going well,” explains Dr.
Is silence the best response to an ex? ›There is no easy way to deal with a breakup, but remaining silent actually speaks volumes to your ex. After all, actions speak louder than words! By staying silent, you're telling your ex that you're strong, resilient, and independent. You're relying on yourself — and no one else — for your own happiness.
Why ignoring your ex is powerful? ›Distancing yourself from your ex gives you space to explore your emotions, gives you the time to process the hurt, gives you perspective, and more, which eventually allows you to move on from the heartbreak. Forget what guys feel when their ex ignores them or what anyone feels when they are cut off by their ex.
Why no response is the best response? ›Sometimes, no response is much better than a response. However, there's no rule to this. If you find it challenging to deal with a blunt “no,” then no response may be much better than a response for you. This is because when they refuse to reply to you, you can easily make excuses for their behavior in your mind.
How long does it take to completely forget your ex? ›When looking at the timeline of breakups, many sites refer to a “study” that's actually a consumer poll a market research company conducted on behalf of Yelp. The poll's results suggest it takes an average of about 3.5 months to heal, while recovering after divorce might take closer to 1.5 years, if not longer.
Why do I still love my ex even though he hurt me? ›We feel they love us even though they treat us badly. This contradiction is known as cognitive dissonance, where we believe two contradictory thoughts at the same time. As a result of the contradiction we can become more extreme in our thoughts and behaviours as we wrestle with the disconnect.
How long does it take for your ex to realize they miss you? ›Today we're going to talk about exactly how long it usually takes for an ex to miss you after a breakup. In fact, based on our research you can expect the average ex to begin missing you anywhere between 2.5 to 5.2 months after a breakup assuming you put forth signals that you are “moving on from them.”
How do you know if your ex doesn't miss you? ›- You always start the conversation.
- He doesn't check how you are.
- He's busy all the time.
- He seems to be distracted when you're together.
- He doesn't give genuine excuses.
- Long-drawn-out responses to your phone calls or messages.
- He is unresponsive to your phone calls or messages.
Why would an ex try to get your attention? ›
They might say they just want to “catch up” or something—but you know better. An insistence to meet up with you is a sign that they regret the breakup, they miss you, and they want to get back together. Depending on how your relationship and breakup went, whether to give them that privilege is up to you.
How do you know if he has moved on? ›- Communication Dwindles. Relationships are built on interactions, and if you're not in touch in one way or another — in person, on the phone, or elsewhere — there's not really a relationship. ...
- Interactions Become Less Fun. ...
- Interactions Become Less Awkward. ...
- They Get Serious With Someone Else.
- Lack of support. ...
- Toxic communication. ...
- Envy or jealousy. ...
- Controlling behaviors. ...
- Resentment. ...
- Dishonesty. ...
- Patterns of disrespect. ...
- Negative financial behaviors.
- They begin to communicate with you.
- They apologize for the breakup.
- They show more affection.
- They discuss issues in their present relationship.
- They try to atone for past mistakes.
- They show pessimism when you tell them someone else is involved.
- They stalk you.
"Chances are, if you have a toxic ex that has a strong hold over you, probably one of the reasons they are an ex is that you were never quite fulfilled in that relationship. The relationship never materialised to its potential, leaving you yearning for more attention and affection." Dr.
Why is my ex texting me all of a sudden? ›So, what's the real reason behind your ex texting you? “The likeliest possibility is that they are reflecting about the relationship and are missing you,” psychologist Samantha Rodman explained to Huffington Post.
Why would an ex reach out? ›Exes reach out for a lot of reasons, and wanting a relationship again might be one of them. However, your ex might also be reaching out because they want closure, because they want to be friends, or because they just want to hook up one last time. It can be a shock to get a random text or phone call from your ex.
Why do I have such a strong urge to text my ex? ›That burning desire to text an ex or old flame doesn't necessarily mean you still want them (though it might!), but it likely means that you're, well, curious about their life or their family or their potential lingering interest in you.
How do you know if your ex still thinks about you? ›If your ex is trying to contact you, or maybe even trying to speak to you at weird hours, then it might be a sign they still think about you. Another big sign is social media. If they somehow didn't get rid of you via an unfriending or straight block, it might mean they miss you.
What are the signs that your ex wants you back? ›- They Make Attempts To Stay In Touch. ...
- They Keep You Updated. ...
- They Get And Want To Make You Jealous. ...
- They Pretend That They Need Your Help. ...
- They Keep Bringing Up Your Memories Together. ...
- They Tell You How Far They Have Come. ...
- They Keep Checking With Mutual Friends About Your Well-being.